Jared's Emporium of Wierd, Wonderful Things.

Poor stupid girls.

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 21:57:14 -0700

Her: you either fall in love and love them forever or you never really loved them at all.
ME: oh, that's your bull shit, chick flick movie, chocolate eating, notebook watching, online dating, sex and the city, he's just not that into you bull shit side saying nonsense quotes that some chain email told you that if you didn't send it to 25 people and spin in a circle 12 times and count the number of freckles on your arm and divide it by 3.14 while thinking about your perfect man then you'll never get married.
Her: no, it says..
ME: No no no no no. It's such bull shit. Ok. You fall in love with someone and sometimes people change and they're not the person you fell in love with and it's ok that you don't love them anymore. You fell in love with a guy and he was awesome but 2 years later you caught him cheating. You didn't fall in love with him as a cheater, did you? No, you fell in love with him as the awesome guy. He changed. He's not that guy anymore. It's ok to not love him.
Her: ....
ME: It's like the lemon law. Everything ran great on the car when you left the lot. You didn't know the transmission was going bad and someone had illegally changed the mileage on the car. You didn't know it was once used for drug runs to Canada. YOU DIDN'T KNOW THEN. You find out 2 years later and you take the fucking car back and get your money.
Her: ....
ME: Aha! See? I'm right! Sex and the City didn't tell you that. I DID, without any chocolate in my system and never have been Notebook'ed. You tell Taylor Swift to put that in a song, maybe people will get it.

emonerdcorp: sarazorel: zatanna: wildclaw: via...

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 21:51:33 -0700

emonerdcorp:

sarazorel:

zatanna:

wildclaw:

via dcu.blog.dccomics.com

I have been waiting for this.

It should be awkward in the most awesome way possible.

Any of you ladies interested? :O

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 15:24:56 -0700

Any of you ladies interested? :O

Trailer for Robin Hood, starring Russel Crowe and directed by...

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 14:39:44 -0700

Trailer for Robin Hood, starring Russel Crowe and directed by Ridley Scott. Looks hella cool. :D

Oh God. I’m officially going to hell for laughing at...

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 11:31:38 -0700

Oh God. I’m officially going to hell for laughing at that.

sexual:

I didn’t want to laugh.. I didn’t… I just thought “geezus when memes collide” and there it was…. grammar reminders at the end…. I laughed for all the wrong and right reasons

ex-genius:

veruca-salt:

it should read tighter THAN a fifth grader. tisk tisk

A flaw in Santa’s...

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 10:28:10 -0700

A flaw in Santa’s logic.

youmaybeoffended:

thedailywhat:

SMBC.

Sharing a kick-ass Batman image before drifting off to the Land...

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 00:10:14 -0700

Sharing a kick-ass Batman image before drifting off to the Land of Nod. Peace, homies.

imperiousrex:

Jock online

My rendition of Power Girl.

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 23:10:22 -0700

My rendition of Power Girl.

“Stefani Germanotta, now known as Lady Gaga, performing at...

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 21:42:04 -0700

“Stefani Germanotta, now known as Lady Gaga, performing at Ultraviolet Live, NYU’s annual talent show. She ended up coming in 3rd place. 2nd place was Funky Butter. 1st place was Tom Costello & Stephan Magloire.”

Tell me—why the HELL doesn’t she do more stuff like this?

Guilty Pleasures

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 21:24:25 -0700

trendyhipster:

jessieshungry:

Single Ladies - Beyonce, Bad Romance - Lady Gaga, The Notebook, A Walk to Remember, and P.S. I love you.

What are your guilty pleasures?

Dirty south rap, Sex and the City and UFC.

I’ve listened to some Justin Timberlake and liked it. Lady Gaga does have a good voice, though she kind-of wastes it playing that awful, soulless techno-pop she does.

SUPERMAN BLEEDS BLACK LIKE HIS SOUL AS HE LISTENS TO MY CHEMICAL...

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 21:19:25 -0700

SUPERMAN BLEEDS BLACK LIKE HIS SOUL AS HE LISTENS TO MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE CDS.

comicallyvintage:

sufferbus: (via ailan)

“We love you Natalie!”“I wanna fuck you...

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:52:37 -0700

“We love you Natalie!”
“I wanna fuck you too!”

sexual:

the first time I ever saw this I laughed so hard I cried.. and it made me like Natalie even more (if that is even possible). Later I found out still to this day she loves nasty rap songs and singing them as loudly as possible. Ohhhh little Jewess I love you!

infinitebutterflies:

suicideblonde:

I don’t sleep, motherfucker, off that yak and the bourbon
Doin’ 120 getting head while I’m swervin’
“Damn Natalie, you a crazy chick”
Yo, shut the fuck up and suck my dick!

“what you want natalie?” ”TO DRINK AND FIGHT!” ”what you need natalie?” ”TO FUCK ALL NIGHT!” (from the same snl)

Today, me and my best friend made a pact, that on each of our weddings, we'd stand up, say: I'd like to make a toast, take out a toaster, put it on the table, wait for the toast to pop up, and sit down casually. I can't wait. MLIA

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:51:05 -0700

okelay:

potterhead:

satinsheets:pwnator:wakocytosis:(via srsly)

The great Disney/Marvel mash-up. The best part is seeing Uncle...

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:37:46 -0700

The great Disney/Marvel mash-up. The best part is seeing Uncle Scrooge look at Spider-Man with dollar bills in his eyes. :D

Wise words. indieporn: Cord Funnel

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:15:00 -0700

Wise words.

indieporn:

Cord Funnel

My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-12-13)

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 16:23:00 -0700

My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-12-13):

Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz

That was sick and yet hysterical. :D m1k3y: Watch Nic Cage...

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 16:14:00 -0700

That was sick and yet hysterical. :D

m1k3y:

Watch Nic Cage Dress Like Batman, Shoot A Child - kick-ass - io9

Okay, Tumblr n00b question

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 15:13:14 -0700

How do you use the “read more” button for this? I couldn’t figure it out.

The Bat Casebook

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 15:08:00 -0700

This is a column thing I try to do weekly for the Raging Bullets podcast site, where I review whatever Batman comics came out. Let me know what you think. :)

Hello, and welcome to another installment to The Bat Casebook, my usually weekly column although I didn’t put one out last week, because I had my wisdom teeth coming in and I only had one comic to review anyway; my bad, peoples. If you’re new to the game, then sit down and listen, for its actually pretty simple: I usually read all the Bat-related comics that came out that week and review them. Savvy? Groovy—let’s get to it.

BATGIRL #5
Written by Brian Q. Miller
Penciled by Lee Garbett
Cover by Phil Noto

This is the issue where Stephanie Brown, the new Batgirl, meets up with the new Batman and Robin, and, of course, shenanigans ensue. Of course, by shenanigans, I mean frozen Robin-cicles and fights between exes.

There’s not much I can say other then I love this book. This issue had a great mix of humor between Stephanie and Damian, drama between Dick and Babs, and intrigue with Steph and Drug-Lord’s-Son-Who’s-Name-I-Don’t-Remember. Plus this had a pretty good cliffhanger—even though you totally know that bullet just crazed off her temple.

I have to say, though, that the best scene of the book so far is now the scene where Stephanie finds Damian stalking her through her college. Not only does Stephanie see her in a frame that’s totally a rift from The Omen (‘cuz his name is Damian, don’tcha’ know?), it was just hysterical seeing Damian completely get on Stephanie’s nerves—the best line being after telling Damian to stop looking at her chest, he replies, “What chest?”

Okay, speaking of which, there is one more thing I will say—I’m going to call it right now: by the end of this arc, Damian is going to have a puppy-dog crush on Stephanie. Considering how much Steph is like a modern day Babs, how else can they top it off by having a tween Boy Wonder following her around?

RED ROBIN #7
Written by Christopher Yost
Art by Marcus To

Not much to report on this issue either. We get more extended flashbacks concerning the origins of the Council of Spiders, Tim running like hell to find Tam Fox from being in the middle of the massive ninja war, Tam is apparently a Badass Normal (search for it on TVTroupes if you want to sacrifice the rest of your day), and Ra’s is going to get into the battle.

This wasn’t a bad issue, really, but one thing that’s really bothering me at this point is these extended flashbacks. It’s now officially crossed the line between “little distracting quirk” to “pretty darn aggravating.” They’ve gotten way too long and boring for boring characters that I doubt we’ll ever see again. It just feels like Yost is trying way too hard to be like Lost and failing. Or it’s filler because they can’t do anything about their initial concept of Tim finding Bruce until The Return of Bruce Wayne starts. It’s really sad, because the initial stuff last issue with examining the League of Assassins and Tim breaking them from the inside sounded really interesting, and it’s been constantly interrupted by this main plot that I’m having a hard time really understanding and, therefore, not caring about. Hopefully it’ll pick up a few issues from now, when solicitations tell me Tim’s going back to Gotham.

And that was all the Bat-books that were saw fit to print for the week. Pretty light week; this’ll probably make for the shortest Bat Casebook yet. I’m half-tempted to write a dirty story to fill it up, but despite what you might have heard, I’m not THAT easy. Next week, however, looks like a full load—with Batman #694, Azrael #3, Batman: Confidential #39, Batman: Streets of Gotham #7, Superman/Batman #67, & Batman: The 80-Page Giant #1. Until then, peace out, homies.

x-meninyourface: super-heroine: morrinamarvel: Ciúme de...

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 14:08:31 -0700

x-meninyourface:

super-heroine:

morrinamarvel:

Ciúme de você…